Thursday, February 02, 2006

Celebration of Life

“I pray that you get the strength to accept the things and to see the tomorrows”

After this line, I couldn’t write anything in that card we gave to her, which was our little token of support.

She….our client manager.I just can’t imagine what all she might have gone though before this. She always was that dignified person with a cracking sense of humor. Make no mistake, when it came to work, she was the boss. But I never could imagine that beyond those authoritative and humor-filled eyes, there was an ocean of grief.

Until the last day when we came to know that her husband passed away we didn’t know anything about that. But what intruded me was the fact that she knew that her husband is going to die and still she maintained the composition!

I don’t know how she managed to put up that brave face when her love of her life for more than 15 years was diagnosed with blood cancer. I heard she did all that she could do to fight to snatch her love with the slowly-inching death. I’m thinking, when she exactly came to know that the battle is coming to an end, how did she take it? From where did she get the courage to face the situation?

I was totally overwhelmed with all these emotions when I attended the funeral service.Funeral service was drastically different from the funerals I had been before. There was no grief, no weeping, no crying and no devastated looks all around. Instead it was like a celebration. I learnt that particular community in Christians does everything passionately, they celebrate everything in life and that includes the ‘final journey’ also.

The funeral service was marked with songs about heaven, meeting the Almighty and about life there. I should say that I felt I was not in a funeral service but in a crowd who was there just to celebrate death or call it re-birth. Then there were friends and family members who fondly spoke about the deceased one. The whole service was aimed at one thing ‘rejoicing’, what they believed that the deceased one is now in a world which is free of pain & grief.

Standing by her young kids, she looked very composed through out the service. Even managed to say a ‘Hi’ to all of us. But at dieing moments of service, she couldn’t control it no more. She broke down and she was escorted out.

These memories are like the waves of sea. They keep coming and making the mind wet…

After the service, we managed to meet her. She couldn’t speak anything but just hugged me, no tears.

I was still thinking about this, when I got this news about a friend’s friend who was diagnosed with a rare case of a blood deficiency. This guy was just exploring and enjoying the life when life handed over this ‘heavy baggage’ to him. He had recently gone back from overseas and was doing great .He had this very happy proud parents and tons of ‘would-be’ father-in-laws looking for him. And now I heard the news that even if all the necessary expensive medical treatment is given, his survival chance is 40%.

My sincere prayers are with him.

I’m just thinking how tough it will be for these people to spend each day. What if you know that you have so many days to live and what if you even know your last days are just a handful? How do you take it?

How about the people who love them? What pain and emotional distress they will be undergoing? How cruel to see that your loved ones are dieing everyday but you can’t do anything but to watch helplessly…

After reading all this, you definitely wonder why this is named as ‘Celebration of Life’.

When I was going through the funeral service which I mentioned earlier, I happened to look at the leaflet given, which described the funeral service as ‘Celebration of Life’. That phrase struck in mind like a bullet.

Do we actually ‘celebrate’ life? Forget celebration, do we actually ‘live’ a life? Even when we know that the days here are numbered, why do we behave as if we are here to stay forever? In such a short span of life, why do we make life still worse with our egos , unrealistic deeds and so many other self-created evils?

I know I’m sounding totally clueless, helpless and philosophical. Can’t help, sometimes life pops up such questions for which we have no answers....


Siri said...

I know what u are talking is difficult to lose somebody to death....I did...
its worse thereafter!

Dienasty said...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
Dienasty said...

The last comment was innapropriate. Stupid me. Life and death is a cycle, i guess. Funerals and weddings.

Two events leaving you with two completely different perspectives. The beggining of something, and the end of another.